One of the tenants of The Husband Project is that every job is more fun when your friends are involved. One of our wives, Sugga-Lamb, (love the nickname, teehee) gave me a sample of the letter she sent to get her friends on board.
“Hello ladies,
Invite Your Friends to Play
Making sure your Valentines Day doesn’t stink
Birthdays, Mother’s Day, and Valentines Day – the Holy Trinity of potential dooms days…
Every other commercial is setting up half the planet’s population for a disappointment in less than a week. The overriding theme? If someone doesn’t get you bling next Monday, you must not be loved.
Most men are not great at the whole “Huge expectations without any guidance” kind of days. (This is not to dis Roger, but I will say there have been a couple of times where I have just gone to bed until the day is over.”)
I want to make sure that you – and I – have a great day next Monday. Whether or not you have a grand love in your life. Whether or not that person pulls through this holiday.
- Keep your Expectations Realistic – If your husband didn’t know how to shop last week, he didn’t figure it out this week. Know the people in your life and keep your expectation down to earth.
- Ask for What You Need – If what you really what for Valentines Day is just some movie time with the one you love (husband, kid, friend) ask them in advance and don’t expect them to read your mind.
- Plan your Own Valentines So what if after being direct and asking for what you need, you still don’t get the couple of totally reasonable things that you had hoped for. My advice? Plan on it.
Even the best of husbands can have a really hard time in the holiday department – and for many of the best women in the world there is no husband by their side to celebrate them.
Married or single, make sure you make some of your own plans for the day. Here are just a few of the ways you can celebrate you on this very special day.
- Stock the fridge with the specialty tea that is too expensive for everyday.
- Plan a girl’s day with someone else and celebrate each other.
- Ask the man in your life (husband, boyfriend, brother, dad) to take your kids so you and your mom can have some time.
- Buy your own expensive chocolate
- Celebrate someone else you love (but not just your kids – a friend or a mentor)
My Resolution this year? Just Keep Swimming
I just did some toy shopping. I ordered a big plush version of Dory from Finding Nemo.
And I bought it for myself. (And maybe, just maybe, I will let my two toddler friends play with it if they promise to be really, really careful.) Let me tell you why I had the sudden need to have a giant stuffed fish on my desk.
Last year, I made a huge list of all the things I wanted to get accomplished in 2010. And you know what? There weren’t a lot of checkmarks.
I started to get really depressed around June. Why wasn’t I getting things done? Why was I working so hard and I wasn’t getting the checkmarks I wanted – ney! – deserved?!?
Until I realized, even though I wasn’t getting the list done, I was getting other things done. God was taking me in new and unexpected directions – it wasn’t what I’d planned on, it was better.
I love how Dory just keeps telling herself, “Just keep swimming”. Don’t get distracted.
That’s my resolution for the year – to just keep swimming. Even if I’m not heading in the direction I though, I need to keep swimming.
So Dory and I are going to be doing 2011 together. I have some things I want to get accomplished (we already made our first Goodwill and dump runs this year – talk about a cleansing ritual…) but I am also going to just keep moving – not get bogged down when things don’t go the way I want them to. I’m going to keep learning, keep seeking God, and keep discovering His plan for me.
So tell me – what is your 2011 resolution this year?
Questions – What if My Husband is MIA
Diane had a great question:
“I have a question already. Both my husband and I travel. He is in
Thanks for asking, Diane. Things can, and often do, come up within a three-week time frame. (I travel so much that if I had to wait to do the project until my husband and I were together for 21 Days, this book/blog would never have been written.) So, we must be a little flexible.
Go ahead and still do a “project” that doesn’t involve him physically being there.
- Write him a note that he’ll find when he gets back from the trip.
- Plan a dinner out for when he’s home and pull together your outfit ahead of time.
- Eflirt with him (an e-mail or text message) while he’s away.
- Buy his favorite snack (you can actually give it to him on another day).
- Try and get to one of his “honey do list” items so he doesn’t have to.
Kathi – Your Project Coordinator
Recreation Recipe of the Week – Grilled Chicken over Marinaded Salad
Grilled Chicken over Marinaded Salad
This is a beautiful picture taken at our very yummy dinner at Treebones this weekend. Here is our recreation”
* 1 tbsp. lemon juice
* 2 tsp olive oil
* Coarse salt and freshly ground black pepper to taste
* 2-3 cups of cherry tomatoes, sliced
* 1 cup of chopped cucumber and peeled
* ¼ cup crumbled feta cheese
* 2 tbsp of finely chopped green onions
* 1 tbsp finely chopped fresh oregano
* 1 bag mixed spring salad
* sliced olives (optional)
* sliced red onion (optional)
* boneless chicken breast with skin on
* 1/4 cup olive oil
* dried rosemary and salt to taste
Combine lemon juice, olive oil, salt and pepper.
Toss dressing with tomatoes, cucumber, feta, onions, olives, oregano and spring salad
Meanwhile, grill chicken with olive oil, salt and rosemary
Dribble plates with balsamic vinegar. Put salad/veggie mixture on plates and top with chicken. Serve with warm rosemary bread.
Thanksgiving For The Guy We Already Have
Hi Project Managers – I know many of you will not see this post until tomorrow, as you’re in the kitchen basting and microwaving at this very moment. (MY husband is making his world famous salsa which requires a great deal of counter space, so I thought I would clear out for a moment.)
It doesn’t matter when you see the post, because this whole project is like one big Thanksgiving Day. We are learning to be grateful for the guy we already have, instead of looking over the fence at the guy who takes the garbage out without being reminded.
We of The Husband Project are actively seeking to change our marriages, not waiting around for the men in our life to change before we do. It is the extreme version of marital chicken – seeing who is going to blink first before we will be nice. Not for us – we are choosing to be nice, everyday.
One of my favorite quotes in the world is from George Bernard Shaw:
This is the true joy in life, the being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one; the being thoroughly worn out before you are thrown on the scrap heap; the being a force of nature instead of a feverish selfish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy. I can think of no higher service in life than to make the most important man in our life feel special.
I pray that you choose to have a blessed and peaceful Thanksgiving.
Kathi – Your Project Coordinator
The Final Installment in this Week’s Eavesdropping on Other Project Managers
Hello again, gals…
Here’s the final exchange between the three Project Managers; this from a wife who’s really given thought to her husband’s personal favorites:
“I totally agree with you M. My husband has not said anything. Sometimes I think I could drop a brick on his head and he wouldn’t notice! Maybe it is a guy thing! [Read more...]
Tools of the Project: Your Husband Project Downloads, Calendar and To Do List
Don’t we all love some great tools to help us bring a plan together?
Thanks to our amazing editor, Teresa, we have the entire 21 days of The Husband Project in one handy download:
Plus, here is a blank calendar to plan out all of your activities for your 21 days:
My suggestion? Print it out and write in what you are going to do each day to bless your husband (but keep it hidden from him!). You can copy it and share it with your accountablity partners so they know how to encourage you/pray for you/ kick you in the butt.
After you get your calendar together, your next step is to get your To-Do List organized. This is the list of all the things you need to do to launch the project.
Download it here:
The Husband Project To Do List
This is where it all happens – need a babysitter for a week from now so you can go out to dinner – write it down. Want to special order his favorite kind of licorice from the classic candy website? Write it down. By planning ahead, you’ll be able to do a lot in advance and not have to stress out the night you’re suppose to make his favorite meal.
What NOT to…Wear Wednesday
After doing my own (highly unscientific) research study, here’s a list of things that many guys don’t like in the clothing department, but are too smart to mention: [Read more...]
Why I shop at Home Depot Before Cooking – 6 Reasons I Can’t Live without Painter’s Tape in the Kitchen
Everyone I’m related to knows of my deep, abiding love of all office supplies. Sharpies and labels and Post-its – Oh My!
But now I have discovered a whole new obsession in life – Home Depot is the the New Office Depot – on steroids.
Since I have been clocking a lot of time in the kitchen for my new book The “What’s for Dinner?” Project I have found a new, invaluable tool for all things culinary – Blue Painter Tape.
While I believe in the the classic uses (check out 3M’s great website for some great decorating ideas,) here are six reasons I am now an evangelist of blue tape in the art of cooking:
1. Identification We are big believers in the green bags and storage containers that keep fruit and veggies fresh longer. the only problem? You can’t see what’s in them.
So as I wash and store my fruits and veg, I label the containers with the contents so I know what’s what.I notice that I am more prone to actually cook at home if I actually know what I have lurking in the fridge.
2. Freezer Meal Labels This is also a great technique for labeling your freezer meals. For each batch , I use a different color of tape, so I can tell right away which meals to use up.
3. Use it up or die of food poisoning trying My whole family is obsessed with pita pizzas (see my very loose recipe on how to make them here.) they are cheap and yummy and low in fat – a win – win – win.
The only problem? We never knew the vintage of the half-opened marinara sauce containers in our fridge. Now I label anything I open with the date that it was opened (and when you ask why I don’t just write on it with a beloved Sharpie it’s because sometimes it get’s all slippy slidey).
This is not only saving us room in the fridge, I know it’s saving us money. We are not opening up new jars of sauce just because we are unable to to identify it age of the three jars that are already opened.
4. Combo Packs OK – don’t laugh. I know this problem doesn’t come up very often – combining slow moving liquids.
But, when you are can’t stand the ANTICIPATION (he he) this is a great way of not having to spend your afternoon waiting for ketchup to drip.
Plus – AGAIN – saving room in the fridge is a beautiful thing. (Obviously, this is a huge issue in my life.)
5. Seal a Meal (or a packet of crispy noodles…) Sealing up opened packages. Not very fancy, but the good thing is you can open it and close it several times and it keeps resealing for a long time.
I’m sorry if it looks tacky (no pun intended) but if it keeps my Chinese noodles nice and crisp – I don’t mind it at all…
6. Posting Recipes (but not on the internet) Finally. If you are like me, one of the main ways I find new recipes is by trolling the internet. I use to stick the recipes up on my fridge with a magnet but the only problem was that the fridge in not located near where I cook. So finally I got smart and taped up the recipes on my cabinet.
I never wanted to do it with masking tape (it can leave goo behind), or packing tape (it can peel paint) but the blue take is a lot like a Post-it – tape-style.
So – here are my questions for you:
1. Do you have any uses for the magical blue tape that I have yet to discover?
2. Do you have any weird or odd uses for other things in the kitchen when you are cooking? I would love to consider using them in the book…
