I was sick when I was pregnant and not just a little bit. Doctors diagnosed me with hyperemesis, which I loosely translate into “throwing your guts up day and night.”
When I got pregnant the second time, people assured me every pregnancy is different. And they were right. The second time was worse.
I sank into despair
For a woman who had led a largely sheltered and happy life, the sickness and helplessness overwhelmed me. Even though I knew the suffering would end with a blessing, my baby boys, I drifted from discouragement to despair. And then I sank. I also followed a harmful pattern that made everything worse. For the first time since I had fallen madly in love with Jesus, I didn’t pray. I didn’t read my Bible. Instead, I withdrew from God.
Just a month after my second son was born, I developed a close friendship with a woman named Linda whose sons were the same age as mine. We were both sick during our second pregnancy, but her nausea had a different source. It was caused by the chemo she was receiving for a rare and aggressive form of breast cancer.
Faced with a terminal illness, a new baby, and a grieving family, my friend didn’t react to overwhelmed by pushing God away. She drew close to Him.
In her truly overwhelming circumstances, she administered David’s remedy given in Psalm 62:8, “Trust in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge.” (NIV, emphasis added)
What my friend taught me about seeking God
Instead of withdrawing from God like I did, Linda’s secret was that she withdrew each day with God. Linda brought all her emotions to God and let Him help her. She didn’t try to fake cheerfulness in His presence or avoid Him completely. Instead, she trusted Him with her feelings and found Him to be her refuge.
If you’ve made my mistake and developed a pattern of withdrawing from God instead drawing close, I have an action step for us to take. Let’s set a reminder on our phone or a write a note on our calendar each day at a specific time that says, “Pour out your heart to Him.” When our daily time arrives, let’s take the next five minutes to bring our honest feelings to God and ask Him to help us with them.
Creating a new pattern of withdrawing to Jesus in overwhelmed times instead of hiding from Him means we access His power, strength and peace to face the day. We’ll not only build deeper trust in God, but just like my friend Linda, we’ll strengthen and inspire others.
One Small Win: In the past, have I responded to overwhelmed by withdrawing from God or with Him? What steps can I take to either change or strengthen that pattern?
Amy Carroll is a speaker and writer for Proverbs 31 Ministries. She’s the author of Breaking Up with Perfect as well as the director and coach of Next Step Speaker Services. Amy and her husband live in lovely Holly Springs, NC with a bossy miniature dachshund. You can find her on any given day texting her two sons at college, typing at her computer, reading a book, or trying to figure out one more alternative to cooking dinner. Share life with Amy at www.amycarroll.org and on Facebook.
Setting my daily alarm right now. Great suggestion, thank you.
Amy, thank you for sharing your story. Your right when you pointed out to us all, God is in control, not us! I pray everyday, but not at a specific time. I’m going to intentionally try this, first pray for help in knowing that I can’t control my situations. Well, not all of them especially this particular one. But, once again thank you. Every bit of help I’ll take. Amen!!!
Hi Sharon Paavola, my name is Judy and our family is going through a similar situation. My son, 30 years old, is suffering with alcoholism and addiction. After his last drunken state in the middle of the night there was a serious altercation with my daughter who felt threatened by him so she left. The next day she told my husband what happened and that was it. He also several days before while being drunk threatened his own life. We had him removed by the police and taken to the hospital psychiatric ward. He cried so hard and thought that he would never see us again. This was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do, he may be 30 but he’s still my boy. He is now in intensive out patient therapy but is still sneaking drinks and whatever else. I love him so much but at the same time my heart is broken over this and I’m becoming numb to him. This devotional has helped me see things a little differently, and hearing your story let’s me see that it’s not just us going through something like this. The only thing we can do is turn it all over to God and pray, and pray. You and your step daughter will be in my prayers. Thank you for sharing its hard, and after reading your story it just made me pour out a book here, sorry about that. God bless you and yours ?
Wow, I read this right after reading in my Daily Message Bible for the first time in weeks. I realized in my Overwhelmed state I had run away from seeking God in his Word daily. I had been thinking that I could not take one more day of my 31 year old stepdaughter living with us. She came to us from drug rehab almost 4 months ago. We had committed to 6 months but this week she revealed to us that she had relapsed and used 2 weeks ago. Now my husband says the 6 months will be prolonged. I am screaming inside. I feel so invaded, disrespected, and violated. How do I “love” her instead of seeing her as my enemy.
Your words reminding me to take those 5 minutes honestly speaking to God brought my desperation to a lower level knowing my God will hear me, come along side me, and infuse me with peace I can’t produce myself!
Thank you!